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A Unicorn Boner For Humanity
You, sir or madame,
are a nazi if you deny the unicorn-humanity of those of us less fortunate in the beauty department than your obviously-anorexic hooved-and-horned friends. When I first published my translation of "Unnatural State of the Unicorn" in Polish, unicorns were strangers to mankind, dwelt far away from humanity, seeking out mountains, forests, places where magic might still be found. They ran through green woodlands proud and free Never Chased By Greedy Humanity. Kids these days with their rap music and boners are going to eradicate humanity. (Keep in mind that I have no idea how children are made.) The discretion, the honesty, and the humanity of the unicorn boner -- if I could change anything about myself, I would have a unicorn boner in my mouth 2 days ago , and by 212 people total How empty is a world without rainbows! Where would we be without unicorns! "Every day I feel a little horny" is clearly a nod to the unicorn boner -- solidarity with all things happy and fluffy and horny As pink, as new, and as loud as a moist newborn Unicorn boner. And when you follow your moist newborn unicorn boner boners will occur where you would not have thought there were boners, and where there wouldn't be boners for anyone else. There's gonna be lots of moist newborn unicorn boner herbalizing in somebody’s vajayjay. Just you watch. |  |
